https://elazarbloom.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/06/ante-hamersmit-vMP8lfhxPi4-unsplash-scaled.jpg 1707 2560 Rabbi Elazar Bloom, LMFT https://elazarbloom.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/03/logo-9-mar.png Rabbi Elazar Bloom, LMFT2021-06-21 21:01:002021-06-21 21:01:00Nurtured to Thrive
When father’s day comes around, It’s natural to wonder how you are doing in that role. The cards feel good but you know the kids are forced to make those by well-meaning teachers and/or mothers. So how do you “check your ratings” (borrowed from a favorite Calvin and Hobbes)?
I’m not sure, but a line that resonated with me is that a parent’s primary role is to help his child feel that life is not
“surviving because you are fit”
“thriving because you are nurtured and loved”.
Survival is the activated energy of the sympathetic nervous system and is normal and useful (in truly dangerous situations). If it is overly activated it prevents a child from feeling comfortable in his own skin, playful, friendly, open, connected, joyous and calm; feeling like he belongs.
I like this way of looking at my role. How well am I responding to him/her that sends the message: You are ok, safe, with an ever available home base and a loving, caring human cheering on your explorations and adventures.